Book: Assertiveness Training

Christian assertiveness training

Christian Assertiveness Training




How to Assert Yourself to Juniors

We can see a good example of how to assert yourself to your juniors from Moses when people from the tribe of Gad and Reuben approached him requesting to settle on the eastern side of the Jordan river instead of crossing it to fight for their Promised Land on the western side. 
Moses asserted himself by following these ASSERT steps:

A  Assess your problems, feelings, goals, right, needs, and wants
Moses saw that this issue of the two tribes not wanting to fight for their Promised Land on the western side of the River Jordan could anger God and cause Him to abandon the Israelites in the wilderness and destroy them. (Numbers 32:15)
S  Set a convenient time and place to meet
Moses did not have to set a convenient time and place because he chose to talk to the Gadites and Reubenites when they presented their proposal to him. The timing was convenient since they approached him when he was with Eleazar the priest and the other Israelite leaders. The place was also convenient since at that time all the Israelites had camped in the Moab plains along the River Jordan opposite Jericho.
S  State the problem clearly
The problem according to Moses was that if the Gadites and Reubenites decided to settle on the eastern side of the Jordan river, their brothers from the other tribes would get discouraged and not fight for their Promised Land on the western side of the Jordan. This would lead to God abandoning them in the wilderness and destroying them. 
Moses, therefore, stated the problem clearly by asking the Gadites and Reubenites, “Shall your brothers go to fight for the Promised Land while you sit there? Why should you discourage the other Israelites from going to fight for the land which God has given them?” (Numbers 32:6-7)
Moses also told the Gadites and Reubenites, "If you do not follow God, He will leave you in the wilderness and destroy all the Israelites.” (Numbers 32:15)
E  
Moses did not have to speak using "I" sentences because he was speaking on behalf of the other Israelites since God had already told him that he would not go to the Promised Land. 
That is the reason he asked them, “Why should you discourage the other Israelites from going to fight for the land which God has given them?” (Numbers 32:6-7)
However, for purposes of assertiveness training, Moses could have said, "Your brothers will feel discouraged and they will not go to fight for the Promised Land on the other side of the Jordan."
R  
Moses did not directly request for what he wanted the Gadites and Reubenites to do. I think it is because he knew their history of being a rebellious people who often did not do what they had been told to do. 
Instead, he told them indirectly what he wanted them to do which was for them to help the other tribes fight for their Promised Land on the other side of the River Jordan. That is the reason he asked them, "Shall your brothers from the other tribes go to fight on the other side of the River Jordan while you sit here?" (Numbers 32:6)
T  
Before telling the Gadites and the Reubenites the consequences of their actions, Moses begun by giving them a brief history of their nation because he said, “Your forefathers did the same thing when I sent them from Kadesh Barnea to spy the Promised Land because after they had seen the land, they discouraged the other people and so they did not go to the Promised Land.
Consequently, God’s anger was aroused and He swore that none of the men who had come from Egypt would see the Promised Land except for Caleb and Joshua. God was so angry with them that He made them wander in the wilderness for 40 years until they all died.
And now look! You have taken your forefather’s place to increase God’s anger against His people.” (Numbers 32:6-14)
Moses then told them the negative consequences of not helping their brothers from the other tribes fight for their Promised Land on the western side of the River Jordan because he told them, "If you do not follow Him, He will leave you in the wilderness and destroy all the Israelites.(Numbers 32:15)
Moses also told them the positive consequences of going with the other tribes to the other side of the Jordan and fighting for them because he said, “If your armed men cross the Jordan and subdue the Promised Land before God and after this return and you shall be blameless before God and before the other Israelites and this land on the eastern side shall be yours”. (Exodus 32:20-22)
As a result of telling the people from the tribes of Gad and Reuben the positive and negative consequences of their actions, they agreed to build cities for their women, children and livestock but their armed men would go and help the other tribes fight for their Promised Land on the other side of the Jordan River.

Book: Assertiveness Training

To learn more read Assertiveness Training which uses examples from the Bible to teach you:
*How to assert yourself to your superiors, peers, and juniors.
*How to stop being a people pleaser
*How to say "NO" nicely  


     


Assertiveness Training PDF Book

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